Trust in Relationships

Surviving a situation in a relationship involving your partner cheating on you is a million-dollar question.

It isn’t straightforward and much will depend on how you define cheating.

This could range from messaging or flirting to having a full-on affair.

Either way, if a couple are to move on together from a situation whereby one has cheated on the other, it will depend largely on how that person views trust.

When trust has been broken for some, it will feel almost impossible to fully trust their partner again.

It will feel as if they have been betrayed, deceived and lied to and this level of betrayal may never be fully recoverable even if they decide to stay together.

It will be important for the partner that cheated, to demonstrate full responsibility for their actions and not in any way to incriminate the other partner in their decision to cheat.

If this is possible then couples may feel more inclined to stay together. It requires determination and the ability to accept what has happened and move on.

However, if your partner tries to implicate you as the reason they cheated – if you had been more attentive or instigated sex more etc then they wouldn’t have looked elsewhere, it is likely there is a context of other behaviours you have been unhappy about.

You could be in a relationship whereby you are made to feel guilty and responsible for all your partner’s actions and behaviours.

We can feel coerced into believing our partner’s reasons, but the truth is we are all responsible for our own behaviour.

The bottom line is it was your partner’s choice to cheat on you.


In this situation, I would suggest you seek some support to explore the whole context of your relationship and how you feel about yourself being in it.

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